
Today marks the one year anniversary of the shooting at Northern Illinois University.
For those that don't know or haven't pieced it together, I used to work for the local paper as their webmaster. We always had a police scanner on in the newsroom where I worked (technically it was one big building with just the four walls, just sectioned off). Around 3:06p we heard that there was shooting on the Northern Illinois University campus. We already had a photographer down on campus and luckily a few buildings over. One of his photos from that day was picked up by AP and used all over the United States. Our editor sent every reporter (3) and photographer (2) down to the scene. Then he sent me. I knew how to take video on one of our digital cameras. I got down there at 3:30p. All cell phone reception was immediately gone. I found the original photographer and he helped me learn to be a reporter, to ask the questions, to get the interviewee to talk. I got some good clips, one of an injured being wheeled out on a stretcher to a waiting ambulance. I hate to say that way but at that time, I was in "working" mode. Later that day, I was updating the stories online continuously, new headlines with the number of injured and dead. The word "dead" didn't mean anything to me. It was just a word. The video and pictures were constantly added to the web. I worked very hard as did all of us that day. When I finally got off work around 2am, I went over to my boyfriends house and I broke down. He was sleeping on the couch, waiting for me. He did his best, supporting me as he was tired and he still had to get up the next morning and work. At that time, I realised what the word dead really meant. That 5 young students lost their lives. The words of their actions finally sunk in. I went to several events in the days following. Leading up to a memorial service, NIU held a week later, that Brent and I attended. I needed to go. I held his hand the entire time, I put my head on his shoulder, the tears slid down my cheeks. I was glad that he was there that day. A month to the day, was my last day at the Daily Chronicle.
Right now, there is another memorial service going on for the anniversary. I couldn't bring myself to go. I do still need the support. The someone to hold my hand. To let me rest my shoulder on them. Yesterday at Kishwaukee College, there was a memorial service. It upset me. I wore what I was wearing that day. It had red in it to support my Northern Illinois Huskies. During my run this morning, I kept thinking of what I was doing that morning, how I was working, not knowing any different. I already had an interview set up for Kishwaukee College for the following week and another interview with another company the next day, which I ended up having to reschedule. After the run today, we went to Panera for a gathering and some coffee, or in my case, hot chocolate. As I was leaving, right before 10:30a so I could get home and watch the memorial service online, I ran into the original photographer that was down there. He left the paper not soon after me and I heard that he moved out East. I sat down and we talked for a while. He came back for this very day since he was the first one down there. He doesn't shoot any more but for fun and totally is doing something far different than working in newspapers. He wasn't going to the memorial service either but probably some of the events later on in the afternoon. I had thought about attending the candlelight service at 6pm but it's going to be a media circus down there. CBS2Chicago already did a special on the survivors last night. A couple Rockford stations as well.
Just earlier this week, I had thought of the ones still at Daily Chronicle and those who have left and wonder if it still affects them. I wondered especially about Eric and Jim Bowey, the editor, who really became someone different that day, a great leader, directing us in the way he wanted to take the paper for the next week.
After Eric & I talked for a little bit, we split up and I headed home to watch the memorial service online. I scroll down and see that it's also on WTVO out of Rockford so now I have that on instead. What they're doing now is good. 5 different people reading short lines about ones lost and lines from celebrities. It was good, very nicely done and read nicely too. I will watch the rest of this and be thinking of Northern Illinois University, Huskies past & present and of course of the families of the ones we lost that day; Dan, Gayle, Julianna, Catalina and Ryanne.
It's powerful how something can still affect your emotions, a year later.